As anyone who has been thinking of divorce knows, January is known as divorce month, though the full culmination of divorce month does not actually end until March, when courts usually start or end the proceedings. January has gained the divorce month moniker because of the historical uptick in divorce filings in the month of January.
According to industry insiders, January is the first month after all the big holidays, and a couple’s problems are usually at a boiling point during these high-stress times, especially with multiple family events packed together. And, often, couples, especially those with kids, want to wait until after the holidays to “break up the family.” January is also a time that is traditionally thought of as a time of new beginnings, and for some married couples, their New Year’s Resolution is to begin their new, single life.
What about for divorcees?
For those that have already divorced, January may now be a reminder of their failed marriage, which, for some, can cause some depression or hard feelings. And, for co-parents, this may cause additional, unneeded stress.
Ways to overcome generally
First, focus on the positives. For divorcees, they have already begun their new life. Think about all that one has accomplished, not on what has been lost. Get outside. Go to the beach. Go to one of the million tourist destinations in our state. For Floridians, we are in the perfect area to help us get through these January blues. Most importantly, do not think of this month as the month that ended a marriage. Instead, think of it as the month that started the second, better chapter of life.
For divorcees that are still co-parenting with their spouse, the best way to get through this month is to keep the best interests of the children at heart. The holidays were about them, and so too should this time. There is no need to pick a fight or open up old wounds. Remember, the extent of an ex in one’s life is only with that child, and everything else is just noise. They do not have a place outside of parenting, and so they should not occupy any space in one’s head either.
For our Orlando, Florida, readers, the holidays were hard, especially over the past couple of years. However, this month is a new month. It is the start of the new year, and it is up to us all to make it our best year.